The Ramblings of A Missionary Wife

Dreams. That word brings up different feelings for different people. We all have good dreams & bad dreams. We all dream of doing big things, of traveling beautiful places, of the person we will marry, of the life we want to have.  And then you have THOSE dreams. Dreams that mean more. The ones that are so real, you can touch them, taste them, see them. The ones that excite your spirit & encourage your soul. I don't think all dreams are signs or spiritual even, but THOSE dreams. I think it's God talking. To encourage you, to start you on a path, to give you hope. It's like He took the thought right out of His own mind & put it in yours. He is written all over it.  Sometimes He even gives you dreams that He fulfills in others. He gives you dreams FOR others.  Instead of realizing this, we just get mad because God isn't fulfilling or giving us our dreams. We mope & cry, when in reality, The Lord is wanting to use us to help prepare others for His dreams! Th...

You hear it a lot. Everywhere you go. The multitudes of "I could nevers. And a lot of them from such opposing views. "I could never have that many kids." "I could never just have one child." "I could never homeschool." "I could never trust someone else with my kids education." "I could never go to a church like that." "I could never marry that person."  Or the ones that hit a little closer to home for us. "I could never live in a third world country." "I could never take my kids away from their grandparents." And the one we hear the most often, "I could never do what you guys do." (I heard this one a lot when we were on furlough last year.)  Well, I have news for you. No, you couldn't. And yes, you could. This mindset of "never coulds" comes from living a life of comparison. We see others doing what seems like the impossible or others not doing things that seem so easy or natura...

Our electricity has been going out at least once daily for several hours, sometimes all night. They call it a "brown out" here. It gets really, really annoying when I'm in the middle of dinner or a science experiment with the kids and out it goes with no promise of when it will be on again. In some ways, it seems like my life has been a "brown out" lately. The power out. The drive gone. Trudging through the day because I know that's what I need to do. Dealing with another bad attitude, another sudden change of plans, another unhappy person. I feel like I've been on this honest kick with myself lately. Be honest. Don't stuff it. Don't wait until later to deal with it. I've discovered through experience that "stuffing it" for now, always leads to an explosion later... One thing I'm struggling with though is this. How do you be honest & not complain? Yeah. My being honest seems to quickly lead to a huge "O, whoa is me!...

So, I don't think anyone who knows me would say that I am a quiet person. I talk a lot & am pretty comfortable around people. But there is a part of me & a lot of others like me that is quiet.  Do you ever find yourself telling someone or wanting to tell someone, "Just because you scream the loudest doesn't mean you'll get the most attention." Sometimes I really wish that were true. Because if you think about it, which one of your kids or friends gets the most attention? The one who screams the loudest. Who in your extended family or workplace gets the most attention? The one who causes the most drama. It's so true. The people who cause problems & make drama are the ones who get the spotlight & attention. And then, there are the quiet ones. The ones who say, "I'm fine," when you ask how they are doing. The ones who never make a big stink about anything. The ones who always seem to have everything together. The ones that people oft...

My dad recently asked me, "What does Mom mean to you?" As I sit here across the ocean from her & think about that question, I struggle for words. How can I put into words what my Mom means to me. There are none. But I'll try my best.  My Mom means strength- She is one of the strongest people I know. Unfailing, always there strength.  My Mom means patience- Don't remember one time that she raised her voice to me. And I was a back-talker!!! My Mom means encouragement- She IS THE MOST encouraging person I know. Always speaking encouraging words, writing encouraging words. Speaking life. My Mom means trust- In very dark, painful experiences, trusting the Lord always has a purpose. I say words to myself that she always said to me, "It'll all be all right!" My Mom means responsibility- Getting up at 4 am year after year to get time with the Lord before all the kids got up. She taught me to take responsibility for my actions. Another one of h...

As I was walking to the front of Wal-Mart to try & find the shortest check-out line, I saw her. It was just another busy day. We had been home on furlough for several months & I was trying to hurry, get my stuff, & get out, which is pretty much impossible in our small town Wal-Mart. I wasn't in the best mood anyway & didn't feel like talking much. The checker at "the shortest line" was a tattooed, pierced girl who looked "shady" to me. She had already seen me so I was pretty much committed. I just hoped maybe I wouldn't have to talk, avoided eye contact, & was thanking the Lord for how automated our world has become...when I hear this cheerful voice ask me, "How are you today?" I looked up at her face for the first time & was surprised as I saw beautiful, clear, blue eyes. She proceeded to tell me how her day had gone & about the special Easter services her church was having the next few weeks. Church. Really? I as...

You know how you just have "those days?" You find yourself telling your friend, "Yep, it's one of those days." Well, it has definitely been one of those days; one of those weeks really. One of those where everything doesn't go right & your attitude is following suite. We're on Day 4 with no water. It comes on for a little bit at night & fills the tank up enough to do dishes in the morning & flush toilets. Then, it's gone. The power has gone out everyday this week for up to 9 hours at a time. It's super hot & I feel sticky, tired, & pretty much defeated. As we sit & try to do school without a breath of air & the kids have just as much energy as ever, I feel crabby & I just want to go crawl in a dark, cool hole. As I find myself ranting to my poor husband about my woes, (like he can do something about it), I realize something. My vocabulary is full of two little words. "I feel." Feeling are real. Feelin...